Reporting Live From Beneath
a Snowbank...
No snow until three days before Christmas and
then all hell broke loose. Previous years have
been similar but not quite
this bad. So as the
snowblower stalls and the back strains to shovel
the piles of sludge at the end of the driveway
from the roadplow, we bring you this not quite
timely but yet still festive newsletter.
The Underground Prepares for a
Bundle of Joy...
2001 has definitely been an interesting year.
We began with the purchase of a home near E.
Grand Rapids. Then trips abroad. And now...
Sloth and Steph are expecting! Yes, a newborn
child will join Mr. James Matthew (currently
eight years old) around May or June 2002.
Steph’s tummy is just showing a little so far - be
sure to give her and the kid a hug! Sloth and
his wondrous fiancé are heading in for an
ultrasound in January, and at that point we’ll
know more details... but destiny says it’s a girl,
so if you hear Sloth referring to "Heather"
you’ll know what he’s talking about, eh?
Steph Visits the Isle o’ Green!
To be completely fair, we have to give equal
time and space for Steph to relate to you her
adventures on the Emerald Isle of Ireland. This
trip has been virtually a life-long dream for her,
so we’ll turn the reigns over to her at this point.
The terrorist attack on the World Trade Center
occurred a mere 48 hours before I was slated to
depart for Ireland. The shock of this horrible
occurrence shocked the nation and Sloth and I
were wondering if I was going to be able to
travel abroad at all. But my AMAZING travel
agent hooked me up after the airports opened
once again, and off I went only a day off
schedule.
After an overnight flight, we landed in London
at around 6:30am local time... exhausted and
excited at the same time! It was too early to
check into our hotel and so we went on a bus
tour that went all over downtown London. I
got to see the Big Ben clocktower, Buckingham
Palace, and much more. Overall, London was a
wonderful place to visit, but let’s just say that
my sinuses did NOT share this sentiment... I
think visiting and sight-seeing is much more
tolerable than actually LIVING there!
Above Left: The Entrance to the Ring of Kerry, some of
the most amazing scenery you can see in Ireland.
Above Right: The Cliffs of Moher. They look steep.
They are.
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Above Left: Some unknown, good-looking lady in front
of Kylemore Abbey.
Above Right: The U.S. Embassy in London, just days
after the Sept. 11th attack.
It was a very strange, overwhelming experience.
After two days or so of sight-seeing, we
departed for Ireland by way of Wales. We
traveled by bus and then by ferry across the
water. The ferry was not your average
Mackinac Island ferry, either... those ships
contain everything from entire movie
theatres to shops and restaurants. We
landed in Waterford and had our first
morning there in a WONDERFUL bed and
breakfast. And let me say this: Ireland is
AHEAD of the U.S. in one respect: their
McDonald’s sell veggie burgers!
Whilst in Waterford, we visited the
Waterford Crystal Factory and had a
chance to watch the crystal being fashioned
by masters of the trade (it takes 10 years to
claim the title of "master"). Then we were
off to the West Coast, where we visited
Blarney Castle. I didn’t kiss the stone for
the pure fact that I didn’t think I needed the
"Gift of the Gab" (I have enough of that as
it is!). The view from the top of the Castle
was absolutely gorgeous. The next stop on
our whirlwind tour was the Cliffs of
Moher. Imagine looking from a dizzying
height of hundreds and hundreds of feet
STRAIGHT DOWN (and I mean straight
down) to the sea. Fairly amazing. Galway
City was next, with its picturesque
northwest Ireland hospitality. We visited
Kylemore Abbey in County Galway - a still
functional Benedictine Abbey and private
school for girls. Sligo, a half-hour away
from the northern border, followed. The
situation between Northern Ireland and the
Republic of Ireland is still tense, so we
were warned to watch what topics of
religion and politics we chose when
conversing with the locals.
In Dublin City we stayed in the Temple Bar
District, right off of the River Liffey, and
visited Trinity College - only a five minute
walk from our hotel! I saw the Book of
Kells firsthand, and brought a copy of the
history of this famous text home to the
‘States. St. Patrick’s Cathedral was also in
Dublin City, as well as the famous
Guinness Factory, where I experienced at
last the wonders of the Guinness beer
straight from its source... and many a pint
was consumed!
The last night of our journey was held at
Johnny Fox’s in the Dublin Mountains,
where we watched Irish dancers and
listened to the merry sounds of a true Irish
band. I met and became friends with many
people in my tour group and many of us
exchanged addresses and hugs to remember
each other by. Needless to say, Sloth and I
had no knowledge of our young one at this
time and she was able to partake in many
pints of Guinness along with the rest of us:
we’ll see if Guinness does, in fact, make
one stronger! Cheers!
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Maxwell LIVE...
Alicia Keys and Maxwell graced the stage at the
(under construction) DeVos Center this past fall
- and what a presentation! Alicia, after two
years of working on her debut album, is one of
the more outstanding newcomers to the urban /
soul scene, with tracks orchestrated by none
other than funky veteran Issac Hayes. The
crowd was definitely pleased with her spunky
crowd-interactive presentation, and only with
slight sighs of hesitation did they make way for
the soulful, passionate voice of Sade-backed
protege Maxwell. Sloth danced and sang along
with delight as Maxwell performed classic favs
"Sumthin’ Sumthin’" and "Until the Cops Come
Knockin’" as well as new hits from his LP
Now. If you were unable to witness Marvin
Gaye in concert, this man may be the soul
medication you need.
Sloth Becomes "Right-Sized"...
After surviving many rounds of layoffs from Old
Kent Mortgage Company, Sloth finally became
unemployed right next with the rest of them on
November 15th. So far, nothing has bitten
fully... perhaps he can make a living with his
housecleaning? But then again, the mortgage
doesn’t pay for itself... and 30K+ a year doesn’t
squeeze itself out of the plaster. Stay tuned!!!
Mulick Park Elementary Gets a
Helping Hand...
With more time on his hands, Sloth has been
instrumental in assisting Mulick Park
Elementary (his son’s school) in acquiring new
logos for a series of brand-new T-shirts and
sweatshirts. It helps to know friends who were
actually able to finish college and go on to more
professional positions in the industrial
marketplace. Do you know someone who
could also benefit from the skills of a cutting
edge visual designer? Visit
www.fallenmitten.com!
The Sloth Underground
Website.
What has Sloth been doing for the past month
and a half or so, besides the usual daily task of
chasing potential job leads? Well... you should
know him well enough to realize that he hasn’t
been playing Age of Empires II all day.
After all this time, Sloth at LAST purchased the
domain name of www.slothwerks.com.
Available at this URL is a more
professionally-concocted version of the Sloth
Underground Website, with a much more
advanced version of the Official Sloth Website
(established
waaaaaaaay back in 1995). Punch
it in and check it out, and be sure to report to us
any technical bugs! Our email address is
slothwerks_productions@yahoo.com.
The End of the Snow Weasels?
The Snow Weasel Society has their hands full
with the invasion of a parasitic alien species! Or
could it all be a horrible ploy to kill off the
majority of the main characters and run into an
intellectual property lawsuit from H.R. Giger?
We will never know. Witness the carnage at:
http://www.geocities.com/general_sloth/Episodes.html
Project: Au is Severed!!!
With the Snow Weasel Society episodes
paralleling the life of Sloth, it was inevitable that
the fledgling crew at Project: Au would be
downsized and laid off from work. Check out
updated Character Profiles and their newest
adventures at...
http://www.geocities.com/general_sloth/Au_Project.html
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NEW MUSIC NEW MUSIC NEW MUSIC
Under normal circumstances we usually have
some kind of Christmas poem to put on the last
page here, but things have just been too funky.
So let’s get you all in the mood to chase those
winter blues away with some cutting edge
tunes!
Jamiroquai A Funk Odyssey - It took me about
3 seconds to warm up to this release from the
U.K. group that took an American idiom and
improved upon it: think Stevie Wonder meets
George Clinton meets Maxwell (!!!!). This time
around, Jay K and crew experiment with full
symphonic score and Eastern instrumentation
("Corner of the Earth"), as well as mellow
samba tunes (see "Picture of My Life").
Meanwhile, we are able to enjoy what
Jamiroquai does best: fun-spirited, ecstatic
disco tunes ("Little L") with social commentary
("Black Crow"). THANK YOU!!!!
Prince The Rainbow Children - Prince is
known for his commercial successes, but not
necessarily for his commercially viable business
decisions. You can hate him or love him for it,
but now Prince releases a project LP that
embodies the black music and social movement
of the 1960’s and 70’s. It reminds one of the
socially-aware
Around the World in a Day
(the fallible follow-up to
Purple Rain) with
the sound being of the acid jazz being released
around the time of Prince’s early childhood
(see: Miles Davis,
Bitch’s Brew). Najee, a
veteran jazz sax player, joins the NPG line-up
along with the usual gang including Larry
Graham Jr. on bass (from Sly & The Family
Stone). Definitely a worthwhile listen simply
for the artistic side of things. Check out "Muse
2 The Pharoah" and "Mellow"... what a change
from "I Feel 4 You" from Prince’s debut album,
and yet what a return to form! YES!!!
Dido No Angel - The girl named "Dido" sounds
very much like Sarah McLachlan on her hit
single ("Here With Me") but her style leans
more towards a female Beck: a woman who
composes things acoustically and then has them
digitally enhanced and/or distorted in the studio.
This has made her work a favorite of remixers,
entranced by her simple yet captivating vocals
(not unlike Tracy Thorn from Everything But
The Girl). If you enjoy the work of Fiona
Apple, Sarah, or Paula Cole (as we do), you
owe it to yourself to pick up this album.
Alicia Keys Songs in A Minor - Alicia Keys is
not just a gorgeous, teeny-tiny lady who can
play funky things on a piano. She is also the
new Lauryn Hill who can hammer out the hits
such as "Girlfriend" and hold her own on a
SOLID debut LP that explores the inner soul of
a woman and the longing of love as well as the
pain of loss. It is urban / hip-hop, it is rhythm &
blues, and it is soul wrapped up in a wonderful
package to make fans of D’Angelo and Aretha
Franklin alike go wild.
John Lennon The Very Best of John Lennon - This 1997 release was the solution that many a
fan of John’s music was waiting for: a
comprehensive collection of tunes that not only
hit on most of his major hits, but also his older
tunes as the co-founder of The Plastic Ono
Band. At a time when fellow Beatle and
humanitarian George Harrison has passed away,
this collection is something to experience... with
period pieces ("Power to the People", "Give
Peace a Chance") and songs that bring you back
to simpler times ("Woman"), you can’t go
wrong. Now I’m just waiting for that
comprehensive set from the Harrison Estate...
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